It used to about the game and only the game. Football. Nothing more and nothing less. Oh sure, there was lots of hype, but it was different. It had to do with football as opposed to show.
Now don’t get us wrong. We love a circus as much as the next red-blooded, American football fan. Actually, we prefer the circus to everything else. Who doesn’t love a good party?
Parties are one thing, but the hassle…
It’s enough to stage a revolution or something.
Right?
My favorite thing about the Super Bowl are the folks who are so against the concept of sitting around the TV, planning elaborate menus and calling out of work that they plan alternative events at places like Hallmark stores or the local Borders’. They call it the anti-Super Bowl as if a boycott needs to be staged against commercialization of football and/or pop culture.
Really? Boycott? A football game?
Now I’m for boycotting things as much as the next guy. In fact, there are tons of companies and products I won’t go near for one reason or another, which surely has the execs of those corporations sitting up at night wondering how they failed to connect with me. All I can say to that is, “Sorry guys. It’s not personal, just business.”
If there is a mass boycott or protest going down, I pay attention because doing things like that takes effort and a wise use of time – two things I admire deeply. Hell, anyone can buy ad time and make commercials. And everyone wants to tell you how great they are. Big whoop. As long as there is no marching, chanting or placards, I say, “Let’s boycott!”
Consumers of the world unite!
But boycotting the Super Bowl is kind of like cancelling Christmas because it’s too commercial. Yes, we all know that big-time events like the Super Bowl are far from pure and that the hype supersedes the actual event with a circus filled with commercials, product placement, “celebrities,” and Christina Aguilera, but really, hasn’t that ship already sailed? Should they just play the game and then phone the results into the paper? With all that TV air time already purchased?
It’s all so very comical. It’s one thing for the tea houses and chain book stores to hold their anti-Super Bowl parties for non-sports fans because generally (and yes, it’s very general) those folks are anti-anti. They believe that if something is created for a mass audience then it stinks, and in most cases they are correct though that theory usually only applies to Michael Bolton.
If they really dislike the Super Bowl so much and want to go to their anti-party, why acknowledge that it even exists? Do they wake up and say, “Oh boy, here we are on Super Bowl Sunday. Time for my protest at the corporately-owned book store that helped put the little shop on the corner downtown out of business. Let’s show those football fans!”
Silliness. Just silly.
Still, I read my favorite Super Bowl story a couple of years ago about musicians Flea and John Frusciante when went to a small venue in Los Angeles to see punk stalwart Ian MacKaye play with his band, The Evens. Now for those unfamiliar with The Evens, it is a band comprised of MacKaye and his wife, Amy Farina. MacKaye plays a baritone guitar and Amy plays the drums all while operating the P.A. right there on the stage. They also play “non-traditional” music venues, which means no bars/clubs or arenas. Because of this Ian and Amy hit the road with very little overhead, no support staff and the result is low ticket prices and unadulterated music. No hype, no fuss, no circus.
Just music.
Of course that’s kind of the opposite of the Red Hot Chili Peppers, the band Flea and Frusciante used to play for. That’s not a judgment about that band, it’s just the fact. Regardless, rather than watch the Super Bowl, Flea and Frusciante showed up at the gig to help serve as a roadie crew for The Evens. Inevitably, a reporter asks Flea (a well-known sports fan) if he’s disappointed about missing the big game, and the answer is perfect.
“Who cares about a ball game if Ian’s in town playing his music?” he said.
No frills, no hype, no circus. That’s what it always comes down to…
Writer/storyteller, CSNPhilly.com
And that’s why I’m going with the Steelers in Super Bowl 45. Oh, I won’t be rooting for Pittsburgh (or Green Bay, for that matter). It’s just that the Steelers play an enjoyable style of football because they rush the ball and they convert third-down plays. Not only that, but the Steelers stop the opposition from running the ball effectively. See, the Steelers’ brass understands that in order to win games a team must run it. Therefore, they run it and stop the other team from doing so.
It’s that simple. No frills, no hype, no circus.
In the meantime, I apologize for the dearth of Ben Roethlisberger and Brett Favre wisecracks. I let you down. Sorry.
Steelers 31, Packers 24
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Assistant news director, Comcast SportsNet
I like the Eagles. Oh wait. They lost…
Green Bay wins this game relatively easily. Their passing offense is lethal indoors. We all saw what Mark Sanchez and Santonio Holmes did to the Steelers defense in the AFC title game when they decided to pass. I can only imagine what Aaron Rodgers and Greg Jennings will do. Big Ben is a problem for any defense, but not this Green Bay defense which is fast and powerful. BJ Raji is going to have a field day and be unblockable against the Steelers backup center. Plus, Charles Woodson will reach into his bag of tricks for one last magical effort on football's biggest stage and make something special happen. Green Bay has too many weapons. The Steelers are a little too banged up and Green Bay wins.
Plus, I can't stomach Pittsburgh winning a 7th Super Bowl title when the Eagles are still sitting on 0. Send the Lombardi Trophy back to Titletown. Green Bay wins.
Packers 31, Steelers 21
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Artist
I developed a system for predicting future happenings based upon current events. I have used it for lotto and OTB selections, so picking the super bowl winner is a piece of cake.
Let me walk you through it:
The Steelers are from Pittsburgh. Pittsburgh is right around the corner from West Virginia. As any competent linguist or anthropologist will tell you, there really is no difference between West Virginia and Arkansas - they are basically interchangeable. Therefore the Steelers are represented as 5000 blackbirds falling dead from the sky.
The packers come from Wisconsin, home of cheese and cheeseheads. This country is in the midst of a lactose-intolerance epidemic. Lactose-intolerance plus cheese equal gas and lots of it. Gasoline comes from oil and we get our oil from the middle east. The packers can be seen as the thousands of Egyptian protesters.
So now we combine the two: what would happen if protesters and looters are inundated by thousands of falling birds?
By now the answer should be obvious:
Steelers 20, Packers 12
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Columnist, Philadelphia Inquirer
Forget about football. This game is about Democracy and thwarting Ben Roethlisberger. If Pittsburgh wins, CIA analysts fear The Gray Penis will grow in power and try to have itself installed as a dictator somewhere, possibly in Egypt. No one wants that.
Packers 24, Western PA Creep Show 21
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Columnist, Philadelphia Inquirer
I don't see how the Packers have a chance. Their quarterback ain't never raped nobody, ain't never 'lectrocuted no dogs. As we say in the hood, "You can't be defended if you been suspended." Near as I can tell, this Aaron Rodgers fella won't even smack the puppy's behind if he pees on the rug. What kind of leader is that, I ask you?
Rapists 34, Puppykissers 17
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Phillies writer, MLB.com
Considering I spent my life savings to land a couple tickets to Super Bowl XLV, the Packers better win. I’ll seriously cry if they don't.
Packers 31, Steelers 28
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Phillies beat writer, Philadelphia Inquirer
We like the Packers, and not just because I inherited a cheesehead someone carelessly discarded into a snow bank on South Street last weekend. One of my earliest Super Bowl memories is XXXI. My parents took my little brother and me to Disney World for a vacation. Desmond Howard's punt return was so captivating to a 9-year old.
Have I made you feel old yet? Good.
Packers 23, Steelers 17
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Senior Sports Editor/Columnist, Comcast.net
Break out your hair mousse and rape whistles ... it's Steelers-Packers for all the DTF women in Georgia. I'm going with Pittsburgh and here's why: I took a page from Ray Didinger and broke down the key matchup. After watching hours of videotape with Brian Baldinger, I've come to the only logical conclusion: Peter King (who picked Steelers 33, Packers 27 in September) thought he was pulling a fast one on the Mayan sorcerer by trading his eternal soul for all future Super Bowl results during his lifetime. Little does King know, the world will end sometime next year, making his "eternal soul" trade look Ryne-Sandberg-for-Ivan-DeJesus silly.
Bad for Peter, great for Pittsburgh.
Steelers 33, Packers 27
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Reporter/producer, CSNPhilly.com
Aaron Rodgers scares me more than Ben Roethlisberger, which is saying something, considering I'm female...
I even have evidence (no, uh, not the kind that involves collecting DNA). I'm talking about the Packers' six road losses. In the loss to Detroit, Rodgers was hurt in the game's first half. Against New England, he didn't even play. When the Pack fell to Washington, they were heavily injury ridden. And Atlanta and Chicago? Well, they were the NFC's No. 1 and No. 2 seeds, and neither is playing in the Super Bowl.
Yeah, I know, the Steelers have proven they can bring home the prize. But I'm gonna stick with my gut here, and go with the team in green. What can I say, I'm conditioned.
Packers 31, Steelers 27
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Proprietor, The Fightins
This is a toughy.
It's not often when you get two squads playing in the Super Bowl who are as evenly matched as this year's Packers and Steelers. And if you want me to be completely honest, I have no idea who's gonna win (nor do I particularly care). BUT, I was asked to give a prediction and I plan on wagering on the game anyway, so here goes:
With Maurkice Pouncey (the Steelers rookie Pro Bowl center) still walking around in a boot nursing a high ankle sprain, Pittsburgh will be most likely sending out a right guard named Doug Legursky to start the game as the lucky fella to have Ben Roethlisberger's hands between his legs for four quarters. Now, I'm no football genius, but the center/QB combo is fairly important considering they are the only two guys guaranteed to touch the ball every offensive play. Tossing a new guy into that situation in the biggest game of the season sounds a bit risky.
Don't believe me? Ask Rich Gannon, who got sacked five times and even fumbled a center/QB exchange after *his* All-Pro center Barret Robbins went AWOL in the days leading up to SBXXXVII and missed the game. That didn't end too well for the Raiders, and I'm expecting a somewhat similar result for the Steelers.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, without his normal bodyguard to stand in front of him to let him do what he pleases, Ben's gonna have to fend for himself this time. KARMIC PAYBACK!
Packers 28, Steelers 23
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Sixers beat writer, Delco Times
Let me preface this by stating that I have the ultimate respect for those who set the odds for sporting events. It is a true science, slathered in mathematics. This writing business was a total accident for me. If I wasn’t such a serial screw-up I’d be flying into hurricanes, recording meteorological information.
Instead I’m writing poop jokes on Twitter. Well, I might be doing that either way.
Where were we? Oh yeah: Oddsmaking. It isn’t often that I see the boys in Vegas burp out a number that makes absolutely no sense to me. But this Super Bowl line, in my opinion, is insane.
When the conference championship games came to a close, I was certain that the Steelers would be a favorite – certain. I figured Pittsburgh would be at least a 3-point favorite, and probably a 3.5-point fave so to create some action on the Packers.
Instead, the Packers opened as a 2.5-point favorite, and it has stayed on that number. And I don’t get it.
The Steelers are loaded with Super Bowl experience. They were the No. 2 seed in the AFC – the better conference this season, mind you – despite being without QB Ben Roethisberger (a top-five QB in this league, regardless of where you think he inappropriately placed his junk) for the first four games and sans Troy Polamalu – the NFL’s defensive player of the year – for two games and nicked up pretty badly for a few others. They won 14 of 18 games despite all that. They have had two weeks to heal all the nicks.
The Steelers run the ball viciously, and the Packers don’t stop the run much at all. The Packers are definitely ball hawks – 24 interceptions – but the Steelers will run, run, run, and when they throw, Big Ben doesn’t give you much to take away (just 5 INTs in 389 passing attempts in the regular season). The Jets had the third-stingiest run defense in the NFL in the regular season, and Rashard Mendenhall tore through them like no one’s business.
I know, this is a game in a dome, on a fast track. It doesn’t matter to the Steelers. There are enough Super Bowl rings on the fingers of their players that they know not to let the conditions dictate what they do.
Seven of the last nine underdogs have covered in the Super Bowl, with five of them winning outright. This is a gift, a layup, a gimme. Unless something truly tragic happens to the Steelers in this game, they are going to win and they will do it without much of an issue.
Call it:
Steelers 34, Packers 17
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ANDY SCHWARTZ
Managing editor, CSNPhilly.com
Packers president Mark Murphy went to Colgate. So did I.
Packers 85, Steelers 2
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Phillies beat writer, Delco Times
So I can count how many NFL games I watched this year on one hand. (Wait, can I count that high? Can NFL players?) So the following pick is for entertainment purposes only; please don't spend all your potential dogfighting moneys on betting on "the big game" based on my pick. Breaking it down: Green Bay. I think they've got Favre. I see him on TV a lot, so he must be good. Pittsburgh. They still have the guy who crashes motorcycles and rapes young coeds, right? That doesn't sound like someone I would count on being sober/healthy/not-in-jail. So here we go:
Fightin' Zoleckis 31, Drunken Randarinos, 20
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